Abbie The Cat Has A Posse
Monday, February 01, 2010
That on Sunday, January 31, 2010
THE PARTY OF THE FIRST PART (heretofore referred to as ABBIE) did ask for, and did receive
* A copious quantity of leftover brisket
* New water in his water dish
* Attention

Should, in the future, the PARTY OF THE FIRST PART (we mean ABBIE) make the following claims

1. That he has never been fed
2. That he has never had new water in his bowl
3. That he has never had brisket before in his life
4. That nobody likes him, everybody hates him, guess he'll go eat worms
5. (the list is not limited to the four above, any whine will do)

That these complaints are VICIOUS VICIOUS LIES

So noted and recorded this First of February, 2010

Signed: _____x______ (ME ABBie)
Witnessed and Countersigned: ____y_____ (the guy)

Additional notes from the PARTY OF THE FIRST PART: THEy told me that If I wanted ANY piece of the Briskte I would have to SIgn this first so it is COmpletely Under Duress and should not be LEgal one bit oh wait did I mention I was supposed to get Briskte with this well I NEVER GOT IT so can I have some of yours huh

Oh no Abbie, dey made yoo sign some paper in exchange fur brisket and den did not give yoo da goods? We'll contact a lawyer (with brisket) immediately.
Hmmm. SUMbudy voilated the contract. Abbie, yur just going to have to throw yourself on the mercy of the court. Best start bribing ... er, gathering witnesses now.
Beans has short memries. If you insist you hasn't had none, eventually they'll haf to belief you an gif you sum.

I can recommend a good feline lawyer if you needs one.
These cats, hardened politicians all, recommend taking the high road and claiming no knowledge of this document; you are above such admissions, therefore it must be a)a forgery or b)the efforts of a well-meaning but misguided staffer(=Star Fleet Red Shirt). As helpless victim of this scandalous misrepresentation you are certainly due restitution in the currency of your choice, i.e., brisket.

Abbie? Aryou there?
can i hve your guys briskret rrecpies thnksx then my gfuy can makme briskte toooo
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